Behind The Mirror

I met with Lavi tonight and it was every bit as difficult as I had anticipated. She is cut to the core over the distance that separates us now and in typical Lavi fashion, played it off in a sarcastic and snide manner. She always did do that to keep anyone from really seeing what she felt inside but I have known her too long to be misled. Part of me felt a pang of regret that this time I was the cause of it, but then I looked back on the months she was gone and the agony I endured and it passed.

Naturally, we traded insults, with several aimed at T coming from her as well – even going so far as to call her ‘my little whore’ when I slipped and said that T would never wander given our relationship being what it is now. I am sure she suspects we are bound, though I did not elaborate. No matter what Lavi means to me, that was too much. I fought for control from that moment till I walked out the door.

She made it plain she cared little what happened to T, family or not. I even accused her of sending me on a wild goose chase so that when I did not find T, and she never made it home, I could satisfy myself that I had tried and come back to Lavi for comfort. Finally, I had to break down….admit to Lavi that I needed her and I could not do it without her. I could tell that little victory tasted so very sweet to her. She told me to go to Vegas and see Violca, that there were whisperings of some of us there and she would be able to tell me if anything was up. Gave me a necklace to take to her too.

I thanked Lavi but I had one moment of ego and I went back, asked her if this was where I apologized for hurting her. When she replied that I should only if I meant it, something in me just could not do it. My exact words were ‘not gonna happen’. It was then that she slammed me into the wall and I decided I was wasting time when I needed to be on the road.

So there it is. I am on my way to Vegas, hoping against hope Vi has something for me. I know I am going to owe Lavi big for this but that can be dealt with later. T is what is important now.

Hold on Love….I’m coming…